Dealing With Difficult People
FROM THE ASSOCIATION OF CALIFORNIA SCHOOL ADMINISTRATORS
EDCAL – Volume 25, Number 33 – April 22,1996

(This information may come in handy when dealing with school officials. It’s important to know the other party’s plan of action.)

“Nintey-four percent of the people surveyed in the 1995 Annual California Education Survey said they were concerned about public education,” said Tom DeLapp, ACSA assistant executive director of communications membership. “Most of those people share the misperception that public education is failing.” Speaking with these people to alter their perceptions through facts and truth isn’t easy.

"Administrators share the unenviable position of having just about everybody think they know how to do their job better than they do,” said DeLapp. “Everybody thinks they are an expert on schools and education because they went to school. When administrators talk with people, they often speak to those who think they already know the answers."

Identify the personality type
“Is the person a hostile aggressive, a complainer, a silent and unresponsive, a super aggressive, a negativist, a know-it-all-expert or indecisive?” ..said DeLapp.

Getting on equal terms
The types of questions that can trap you… include questions that are hostile, speculative, hypothetical, over specific, leading, loaded, based on values, multifaceted, vague/unfocused, yes or no, or not really questions at all.

Do’s and don’ts (partial listing)
Use Negotiation Juijutsu: ask what they would do in your position to be fair to all concerned. Work the crowd to avoid letting one person dominate. Make them write their complaints down.

COPING WITH QUESTIONS: FIVE BASIC RESPONSES

Respond only: Flat answers prompt more questions and “yes” and “no” answers mean that you are victim of their questions, playing on their field.

Respond and insert: Answer and elaborate with information not directly called for… this will establish you as the expert.

Insert and respond: Preface your answer with reflections or information… set the stage. This is a great way to break bad news.

Insert only: If you’re not going to answer the question, then you’d better make the content of your alternative good.

Ignore: Go on as if the question was never asked.

WHEN A PRESSURE GROUP COMES KNOCKING

Summarized from article in “The School Administrator,” Oct. ‘93

DON’T BE STAMPED INTO AN IMMEDIATE RESPONSE

DON’T TAKE MORE TIME AND EFFORT TO RESPOND TO A REQUEST THAN ANY STAFF PERSON OR BOARD MEMBER CAN GIVE TO EVERYONE IN THE COMMUNITY IF OTHERS ALSO MAKE THE SAME REQUEST

DON’T TRY TO PROVE THAT TEXTBOOKS, CURRICULAR MATERIALS OR TEACHING METHODS ARE THE BEST

DON’T EXPECT TEACHERS TO DEAL WITH INTENSE CRITICISM ALONE OR WITHOUT THE OPTION OF RELEASE TIME

DON’T DENY ACCUSATIONS WITHOUT EXPLANATION AND ACKNOWLEDGEMENT OF THE SERIOUSNESS OF THE CONCERN

DON’T BE DEFENSIVE, CYNICAL, SARCASTIC OR IMPOLITE OR TRY TO HANDLE EVERYTHING YOURSELF

DON’T HESITATE TO GET AN OPINION OF LEGAL COUNSEL BEFORE RESPONDING

DON’T FORGET THAT THE BOARD OF EDUCATION NEEDS TO BE KEPT INFORMED OF UNUSUAL, LARGE VOLUME REQUESTS FOR MATERIALS

DON’T TRY TO FORSEE THE RIGHT RESPONSE OR ANSWER TO EVERY SITUATION

The Delphi Technique: What Is It?

How To Disrupt The Delphi Technique, tips on how to protect yourself from those who would use the "Delphi Technique."

How To Deal With Difficult Parents describes how some administrators are trained to deal with questioning, opposing and dissenting individuals.

Dealing With Difficult People, the information referenced in "How To Deal With Difficult Parents" from the Association of California School Administrators, EDCAL - Volume 25, - April 22, 1996

Unmasking The Crime Against Parents: In many ways, the experiences described in this article about Plano, Texas parallel those encountered by parents and community members in Reading, Massachusetts. Reading school administration "mantra" says one thing but their actions reveal a different intent.

A Reference Guide For Recognizing Political / Social Control Tactics - Useful for recognizing the tactics of some school officials and school administrators.

Are You Being Delphied? - The goal of the Delphi technique is to lead a targeted group of people to a predetermined outcome, while giving the illusion of taking public input and under the pretext of being accountable to the public.